It feels like forever since I sat down to write. Well, probably because it has been.
Life with these babies is an adventure. I had a woman stop me recently to ask "Are twins as hard as everyone says they are?" She was a very sweet woman and the question was coming from the heart as she had also struggled with infertility.
However...... Who exactly are these people, saying these things? For me, twins are not hard.
- Maybe I refuse to frame out life from a negative place, but they are not hard.
- Maybe the fact that I never knew just one baby, but they are not hard.
- Maybe the fact that I know the pain of miscarriage, but they are not hard.
Maybe the fact that these two amazing people that I have been entrusted with bring more joy and happiness into my life than I ever could have imagined. They Are Not Hard.
I won't say that we don't have our challenges, of course we do. Our little girl is developing as the rate that is expected for her age. Truthfully, she is probably smarter than I am already, but I will worry about that on another day.
Our little boy is a different story. My husband had been worried for quite some time that he wasn't developing the same as his sister. I wasn't worried. I don't want to compare them, they are different people, who will do things in their own way and in their own time. However, when we switched Dr's a few months back, I became aware that he was delayed.
I won't lie, for a few weeks I did feel a little guilty that I hadn't caught on to the fact that he was not progressing as he should be. I am learning not to hold myself to these ridiculously high standards. We do the best we can, and that is all we can do.
We took our little boy in for testing at the end of the summer and he was diagnosed as 50% delayed in both motor and speech. That was hard to hear, because he is perfect to me. We were very happy to find that he does qualify for state sponsored in home physical and speech therapy, which was definitely the silver lining. He did win the hearts of all the ladies at the testing office with his huge toothy grin, and we were not surprised to learn that socially he is right on task.
So while, everything is not perfect I remain steadfast in my opinion the these babies, they just are not hard. Period.